I’m one of those people who enters a room and the television suddenly blows up, or a computer crashes or a camera malfunctions. Street lights blink off when I drive underneath them all the time. It’s gotten to the point where I’m starting to wonder if my body emits some kind of screwy electrical charge that destroys technology.
I can’t figure out basic computer functions for the life of me. I still right-click for copy and paste. Technology simply isn’t my thing. Sure, back in the Myspace era (when glittering profile layouts were the form of self-expression), I learned a few basic** HTML codes, but all memory of them has now been erased and replaced with useless facts about Farmers car insurance policies.
That said, I’m now in the midst of creating a website.
I need help. A lot of it. So I went to Barnes and Noble and checked out the only section in the store that has remained completely foreign to me until today: Internet and Web Design. An hour into reading–breaking only to release desperate whimpers– I realized there was no hope for me on my own. I have no idea which server to use to host it (is it called a server or am I mixing it all up now?), if I need a lot of space or just a basic amount (I want pretty graphics and awesome interactive videos!!) or if I can even hope to design it without some crazy expensive program. That said, what the heck is InDesign and why does it require a $50 textbook to understand the basics of it??
Clearly I’m out of my league. I may just have to look into hiring a webmaster. Has any other technologically impaired person out there in webland created a website of their own?? Or has anyone hired someone else to do it? Is it worth it?? Ahhhh.
Time to sleep.
**Basic meaning that some two-year-old out there is entering the same codes right now.